Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock

One more day to go! I've actually finished my shopping so I'm going to spend the day cleaning the house and wrapping prezzies. In fact I bought myself a little something as I usually like to do although this was a little unexpected. This year I bought my mum a camera because hers has been pissing me off as it never works and it's basically a shitbox. So anyway I got her a great camera (Fuji V10), so great that I bought myself one too! I had to "quality test" it for her to make sure that it was just right and it's a damn nifty piece of machinery. I bought the last one in town so I have to wait until the 5th of January to get mine so be prepared for photos next year.

Anyway I'll leave you with my favourite Christmas cartoon as it always makes me chuckle. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas or Seasons Greetings depending on what you like to celebrate. I'll probably post before NYE but just wanted to wish you all the best and hope you have a very joyous Noel.

princes, kings and fishermen

Had a chat with a very wise man today about all the nonsense below and we came up with two things which I thought were pretty neato bandito. Have you heard of the saying "You've got to kiss a lot of frogs to find the prince"? This came up in discussion and he said to me "but you're not a princess, you're a queen so you need a king not some wussy prince". So true, I'm not a princess by prissy froufrou definition, I AM a queen, an amazon queen!

And along the same vein we were talking about what a great catch I am and how lucky the next guy is going to be to have me and he pipes us with "we just have to find you the right fisherman". Can you dig it? yeahhhh

Does this mean I need to find the fisher king? har har...

Recipe for lemonade?

It's been a pretty rotten week and a bit. Apart from a weekus horribilis at work, one of the worst ever, I've found out that one of my dearest and oldest friends has found out that a rogue cell from the breast cancer she thought she had beaten has spread to her liver, lungs, hip and brain and probably has 6-12 months to live. Extremely hard to deal with and I'm not sure if I know how to. Cue the days of our lives music... Found out that while on a month long holiday visiting her African lover and father of her third child that my best friend got married to said lover (who isn't allowed to return to Oz for another year because he overstayed his visa and got deported) and is now pregnant with her fourth child. On the selfish side I've found out that both plan A and plan B for New Years Eve have gone down the toilet and that I will be alone for the evening. I couldn't think of anything more pathetic. Wheeeeeee. And the universe is testing me about my old habit. I'm being confronted with it in a few subtle ways and having a week like that has almost tempted me. But I'm staying strong.

And having read some inspiring posts from two of my favourite people in the blogosphere I'm building a bridge and soldiering on. I know I can be prone to attacks of the woe is me's and it is something that I'm trying to work on but a couple of things have stuck with me and has lead to more questions.

Firstly some words of wisdom from WLFG or rather her lecturer Professor Moira Banks "You get as much out of life as you put into it." Now I've heard a version of this little adage from my dad applied in a school work/project sense. When you put it in life context, woah. Very good point. But it leads me to a question. How do I put more into my life so that I can get more out of it? I want more out of life, a whole lot more. But what do I do to put more into it? Maybe the question should be what do I put in my life to get a whole lot more out of it...?

And from Lance's friend ChristiniMartini there is the line "Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin." Oh uhuh, I'm afraid alright. I'm sick of feeling like I'm waiting for it to begin but don't know how to change that. I don't know what I'm waiting for and I don't know how to start it already. With every day that passes I almost feel panicked that it's slipped past again. I think I'm stuck in a rut and don't know how to get out of it. Every day feels like wake up, go to work, come home with nothing in between. Perhaps that's what I need to do to get more out of life. Insert something in between that monotony?

That's the thing that shits me, I want to change, I want things to change and I'm welcoming change but I don't know what it is that I need to do to change. Guess that's where my Melbourne escape plan comes in. Radical change. But is that really what I want and need or is it just running away from what I have here? I don't even know where I can find answers to all of this. Everyone that I talk to have differing points of view and that's great but ultimately I'm the one that needs to come up with the answers I need. And I don't know how to do that. Maybe I need to put a Magic 8 ball on my Christmas list?

In the grand scheme of things I appreciate the small things and I do believe that the universe sends you the information you need when you need it. I think that what I need to do is to work out what I need to be happy and then make it happen. Gotta think on that and break it down and I think that'll be the theme for the next post. But in the meantime any words of advice or the answers to the meaning of life are greatly appreciated :)

again with the bitching and moaning today, sorry bout that... But to count a few good things before you go, Black Books is on tonight - fuggin hilarious and I need a good laugh today, cinnamon Eclipse, I've finally reached my new coloured feedback star on eBay and tomorrow is a new day.

Full moon madness

Whatever can go wrong, will. Today I learnt the meaning of that phrase. I never really thought it possible but oooh yes it is...

My day started at 5am this morning as I suddenly woke up and couldn't get back to sleep... didn't actually have to get up for another two hours so that annoyed me to start off with. I drifted in and out of doze [mostly out] and then finally got up at 7, tired and cranky. Spent too much time pfaffing about and when I was finally ready it was 8:50am and I was gonna be late... of course I'd forgotten that I had to go to the post office AND get some petrol otherwise I wasn't going to make it so yeah... I was late.

I'd only just pressed the ON button on the work 'puter when the bombardment started... bitch n moan, bitch n moan, blah blah blah... so after keeping a lid on my rising temper I head down to the caf to get a coffee [aka substance with which to warm up the care factor] and of course they didn't have any good muffins, pinapple and coconut... Bleuuch, I don't think so.

And from there it only got worse, I had to fix other's "simple mistakes" which had resulted in massive problems, there was continued incompetance from a known incompetant (not really sure WHY I'm surprised by that little factoid but moving right along...), listen to a few ranting tirades from "important" clients - "don't you know who I am??" rah rah, discovered a few more things that I'd been kept in the dark about - I'm considering planting myself in some soil because between the amount of darkness I'm kept in and the amount of bullshit I've been fed I think I'm about ready to sprout.

So. I decided to leave a little early because I'd just about had enough and the next lucky sod that was going to come traipsing into my office was going to get the most severely unpleasant tongue lashing. I was busting for a pee so popped into the loo on my way out of the building and yep you guessed it... I got locked in the loo. The stoopid lock mechanism thingamaboby twanged as I'd snibbed it closed and as I did it I thought hmmm that didn't sound right. Did my bidness and then nope... didn't want to unlock... ooohkaaay. Jiggled the door a little bit... nope. Wiggled the lock thingamaboby... nope. fuck. Me, being 6' tall and plump eyed off the small space between the bottom of the door and the floor... hmmmm not really. And of course there's no one else in the loo and it's one that's relatively out of the way so there's little traffic [I have pee phobia - just can't go if someone is within earshot. yep I'm a freak] so I didn't want to start yelling because a) I felt like a bit of a dork and b) I'd definatly feel like a dork if someone came in and I was locked in and c) we have a healthy rumour mill and something like this would be priceless. Anyhoo that gap between the bottom of the door and the floor was looking pretty good so I sat on the floor facing the bowl, a leg on either side of the bowl and lay down so that I could scoot head first under the door. Did I mention that the cubicle was small? mkay. So I pushed my bag out, got my head and neck out and managed to squeeze my ample boobage under the door when I hear footsteps. Fuck. I started wiggling like mad scooting with my legs and frantically pulling with my arms to get the rest of me out and... phew, the footsteps moved on and I was out! sweet freedom! Reported it to building maintenance and finally got the frock outta there.


I got home and YAY, my shoes had arrived... could it be? a ray of sunshine?? YAY shoey goodness? BUT OH NO... twas not to be... What I was expecting was this:



What I received was this:



no, no, I don't think so. They're OK but not what I had my heart set on and so totally not what I bid on. Anyway I contacted the seller and she made a mistake and put the wrong picture up blah blah blah so now I've gotta send them back and get a refund as they don't have the good ones anymore. Great. Just fantastic.

But on the other hand, I got my Demonia's two days ago and true to form they are fricken unreal. Never really doubted them as I'm a big Demonia's fan. I'm about 7 foot tall in them mwaahahahaaaa! But that was two days ago. Back to the present...

In my little eBay foray I've been selling a few bits n pieces including some clothes which I've bought that still have tags on them etc and did pretty well. Except for one. This bidder has less than impressive feedback and has not paid or contacted me yet and tomorrow will be the fifth day. I specified that they're to contact and pay me within 5 days or else! I don't want to go down the negative road so I'll give them til tomorrow then email them and find out what's going on. *sigh* why can't it be easy? Anyway enough of the bitching. I have a voddy and lemonade in hand and am feeling megatonnes better now.

Had a little laugh last week, Mr Brush from the last post did actually email me back but his email was less than inspiring. "well maybe we can just email each other see how things go. do you have any extra pics. send them to mrbrush@hotmail.com" (not actual email address) Mmmmm how bout no? How bout you send me your pics or talk to me in more than 2 sentances? Lets not bother because you're clearly only interested in what I look like so how bout we don't waste each others time eh? I haven't responded to his email and yes I know, bitter and jaded. But you can bite me because right now the care factor ain't overly high.

But so that you leave with a smile, this article caught my eye:
http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2006/12/07/1165081061811.html?from=top5